It's a trick, John
by twofacedmarco
Summary: A Sherlock one-shot about the emotions during the Reichenbach Fall.


He aimed the gun into his wide open mouth, and pulled the trigger. I stumbled away as the body fell onto the concrete with a thud. I wanted to say something, anything to force myself out of this position, my mind going into overdrive. I was standing here, on the roof of the St.  
Bartholemue's Hospital, staring at my enemy's body. Blood started to flow from his head where he lie. My cold heart pounded heavily within my chest. I reached up to my cranium to try and stop the endless stream of thoughts, to make time just stop as it was. Convincing myself not to pay any more attention to the lifeless body of James Moriarty, I stared longingly towards the ledge of the building. I wonder if it'd do any good; it must in some way- of course! He told me that only by his word, the assassins would be called off.  
John...Mrs. Hudson, Lestrade and Molly would all be dead soon if I wasn't. I took a deep breath and released it after a moment. I paced solemnly to the ledge. Hesitating only slightly, I stepped one foot on the narrow platform...then the other. I glanced down into the street, seeing few cars passing through, yet more pedestrians.  
Shakily reaching into my coat pocket, I pulled out my phone and dialled John's number. I pressed the metal object to my ear and listened to the line ring once...twice...a bit of static occurred followed by my friends voice, "Hello? Sherlock?" I hesitated before saying, "John." "What? Where are you?" his small voice sounded panicked. I stared at the street as a black taxi pulled up. God, I hope it was him in there. I waited for the person to step out of the cab, surely the man was John. He started to rush towards the building and I couldn't help but stutter,  
"S-stop!" He did, "What?" I sighed shakily, "Turn around. Go back where you just were." He obeyed my command and walked back to where he got out of the cab. "Sherlock?" he sounded frightened, I couldn't see the look on his face. "Look up, John. I'm on the rooftop." His head turned up as he saw me,  
"Oh my god..." the poor man breathed heavy, "Sherlock,  
wh-what's going on?" I felt a hot stinging sensation behind my eyes, but didn't try and blink back the soon to come tears. Knowing what I would do next, I feel I deserve to cry at least once in my short life. "Listen to me, John. Understand me now." I was breathing very heavily now. "A-alright..." I took in another deep breath, "They're right. The newspapers." I can guarantee this hurt me more than it hurt anyone else, "I created Moriarty," I looked back at my enemy's body, "for my own purposes." There was a short pause over the line, "No..n-no Sherlock I know that's not true," another pause, "You're lying, stop it." I looked back at him from the roof. "John..."  
I started. "Why are you saying this, Sherlock?!" He interrupted me, sounding angrier than before. "John...this is my apology." I'm sure his face went white as he attempted to process everything I was trying to say. "I'm a fake," I paused momentarily, "A fraud." I could hear John's breathing grow heavier through the phone, "Th-that's not...shut up Sherlock! The first time we met, remember? You knew everything about my sister!" I glanced down once more, "I looked you up. Memorized everything about you...no one could actually be that smart." He wouldn't take those eyes off of me, "You can. You are, Sherlock. You're brilliant, incredible." He paused and started walking towards the building again, "I'm coming up there." "No!" I reached my arm out as if I could stop him. He did stop, but I continued, "Stay exactly where you are!"  
He backed up slightly and held up one arm, "Alright.."  
"Please John...I-I need you to tell everyone. Molly, Mrs.  
Hudson, and Lestrade...tell anyone who will listen to you. I am a fraud." I saw him move the phone away from his ear for a second,  
then back, "Stop it. You're...you're not..." I felt a tear roll down my cheek. I straightened up, "I need you to do something for me." I paused, trying to keep myself from shaking,  
I couldn't let John see me like this, "This phone call...it's my note. That's what people do don't they?" I let another tear fall, "Leave a note." I hated doing this to him. He is my best friend. "What...leave a note when?" I could hear the restrain in John's voice. Another tear. "Goodbye John." I tossed the phone to the side before I heard what he had said next.

I closed my eyes for a few moments, mentally apologizing to everyone: Molly, Mrs. Hudson, Lestrade, Mycroft, even Anderson and Sally. I'd done my dues for John. I may never see him again. I love him. I think he knows I do. This pain I felt in my chest, I can't bear it for any longer. But I need to save him. Everyone. They can't- shouldn't- suffer because of my selfishness. While I'm gone, I need someone to look after him. Not Mrs. Hudson...Molly maybe, or Sarah. I hope to be back... I hope to be back soon. I...I need to follow through now. I took another deep breath, holding it longer this time. These moments seemed like hours to me, but was no more than 5 seconds in reality. I tried sending a thought to John before...-

John, it's a trick. Only a magic trick. Don't cry...please.

I reopened my eyes. I felt the sting of cold air again. I spread my arms and leaned slightly forward. A voice below me called out my name, "SHERLOCK!" The wind surged through my body and I felt like I was flying, not helping the fact my arms and legs were flailing beyond control. This is incredible. In seconds, I no longer felt anything. I couldn't move, I couldn't think, I couldn't feel the wind anymore. I had landed successfully. Goodbye.

I'm sorry John.


End file.
